Cop Out Questionaire Post

Found this questionnaire on Lapband Gal's blog.

I have a TON on my mind but there is so much gunk in there that I just don't feel like sorting it out right now...

So there is this....Hope you enjoy!

1) You’re trapped on a desert island and you can bring only 3 of your favorite foods along. What do you bring?

• Chick-Fil-A Chicken Tenders - They are one of the few things that I break my "No Gluten" rule for.
• Simple Tuna Salad - Made of canned tuna, mayo, and mustard
• Cheese - I heart me some curdled and pressed milk...as long as it isn't bleu...lol

 2) If you could meet any 3 people, living or dead, who would they be and why?

•  Lap Band Gal - Finding her blog gave me the courage to go though with surgery. I found solace in the fact that she is a person just like me. That she struggles with life and love and balance just like me.
• C Flick - She is an amazing person who manages to balance life, and kids, and exercise, and such. She was also a MAJOR reason I finally learned how to run. I never thought I would do it...until she did it. She was just like me...if she could do it so could I! Thank you C Flick!!!
• Luka Beth - She is amazing. I just wanna give her a hug!

 3) What is your stripper name? (take the name of your first pet and the name of the street you grew up on)

• Kacee Rangeview - that is a bit...weird...but amusing...lol

 4) What is your LEAST favorite part of your bod since losing weight? Your MOST favorite since losing weight?

• This one is a tie between my fat belly overhang and my bat wings... - I hated the belly overhang BEFORE I started losing weight...but now it is all jiggly...and it makes this HORRIBLE slapping sound when I run and I have to wear this super tight almost embarrassingly tight pants in order to get my run on. With the bat wings...it is like having pizza dough attached to the back of my legs...It slaps around when I exercise and looks HORRIBLE!
• My arms - Over the last year, while my bat wings have gotten HORRIBLE, my upper arms have toned up and I have a TON of muscle definition that I find sexy...so that little bit of sexy I marvel at and enjoy all the time!

5) Do you believe in ghosts or evil spirits? Would you be willing to spend a night alone in a house that is supposedly haunted?

• I do not believe in ghosts or evil spirits. While I believe there are always things out there that can't be explained yet...I don't believe it is people hanging out after they died...

 6) What is your natural hair color? If you dye it something completely different from what your momma gave ya, how come?

• Very dark brown, almost black - I dye it....I dye it a lot and often. At the current moment the ends are auburn with red and blonde highlights, with black roots and a LARGE purple streak. I change my hair color ALL the time...I have done this since I was 13. This was when my parents separated. This was also my first year of Junior high and kids started making fun of me for being "fat"...My hair color has always been the one thing in my life that I can control and change...

 7) Bikinis or granny panties?

•  Bikinis...I have never worn granny panties...Before I had kids I use to wear thongs but that is a story for another day...lol

8) If you could only watch one movie for the rest of your life, what would it be and why? (Trilogies do not count as one movie, cheaterpantses!)

• The new Star Trek Movie - I LOVE LOVE LOVE Star Trek and I LOVE LOVE LOVE the new reboot of TOS. I am also completely and totally in love with Chris Pine, have been since "Princess Diaries 2"

9) What is your guilty pleasure (feel free to go straight to the gutter with this one if the spirit moves you!)

• Victorian Era Romance novels - there is something about the chaste courtships that sits just about the sexual passion that is amazing for taking my mind off school, work, stress. I can down one of these books in only a few hours. Some of the best ones make me laugh and cry...I LOVE THEM!!!

10) How many pounds gone forever are you celebrating?? :)

• 69 pounds...for the first time in my life I am certain that I will never see this weight again. My weight might be coming off slower then I like but I am sure that that is a MAJOR reason why I will end up being successful.

I struggle

This is something that I almost never REALLY write about.

I mean I mention them...I touch base on them a little...but I never really TRULY speak of them.

Today was a struggle.

My band doesn't stop head hunger or lack of self control.

If I eat when I am not hungry, or eat more than I need too...that is on me.

After this point is when the self loathing kicks in....The negative self talk gets to you and you turn to old vices. "Well, I already f-ed up my day why not go for the gold." So then you turn and you eat more...

And the vicious cycle continues.

The only saving grace is that, unlike in the past, I can't eat as much as I once could. I can't overeat since the band just won't let.

So at least in this instance it slows me down.

It helps a little

I found myself reverting back to the days when I was almost afraid to allow myself to feel hungry. I would eat because it seemed like "it was about time" or that "Would be hungry soon." or the absolute worst one...I am NOT hungry AT ALL and I would eat because those around me were eating...

I am hoping that going to bed will reset my brain...I am hoping for a better tomorrow!

Damn....

Yesterday was the day for breaking streaks....

I didn't do my 30 day ab challenge stuff....

I didn't post on my blog...

I suck...

Not really...

I had a GREAT day yesterday....I managed to get my ass up and out of bed by 5:50 am...I knocked out a 3 mile run by 6:40 am...

It was beautiful...for the rest of the day...I didn't have to worry about getting my workout in for the remainder of the day....this is something I FULLY intend to repeat....it didn't happen today...I was pretty tired and had a long day today...

Today...we went to the zoo...

It was the first day of our Summer Stay-Cation....We are doing this a bit differently this year in the sense that instead of taking one week and doing a toursty type thing we are doing it every Friday...Thanks to my new awesome job...lol

So at the Zoo I took an opportunity to "Recreate" a photo from the past....It was taken in 2011 shortly after I had my son....I thought I would share this little gem with you....

I have to admit I am pretty proud of myself...granted the "Mean Girl" in my head is choosing to point out that I am not in fact smaller, but that my babies just got bigger...

I know this isn't true...But still....

Ok so after out trip to the zoo I had a fill appointment...and we had a softball game (which we lost) and I had to squeeze in grocery shopping....

Needless to say I am EXHAUSTED!!!

So with that...nite nite!

Just checking in

Once again I find myself laying in bed and realizing that I haven't posted yet today...

Today was boringly unproductive despite the millions of things I had to do.

My daughter caught a softball for the first time ever...She was very excited!!!

Ok off to bed I go....hopefully tomorrow is better!!

Guess what I am still alive!!! (Day 10/30)

Man did my day fly by....the simple fact that I enjoy working out at night tends to throw a damper on my day.

The truth is I LOVE how I feel when I exercise in the morning...I just can never seem to get my lazy ass out of bed. Take this morning for example....I had my alarm set for 5:30am. When the alarm went off this morning I was like...dang I don't wanna get up...So I looked at the clock and it was 7:00AM!!!! I have no idea who this happened...My hubby figures that one of two things took place....either I turned the alarm off BEFORE it has a chance to go off...or I turned it off AS SOON as it went off before my hubby and I fully woke up...I HATE that I do this....but it isn't abnormal!

 This subconscious desire to remain in beds leads to me working out at 9:30pm. Perhaps someday I will embrace this but for now it still urks me.

So on to my exercise for the day....

Today's challenge was *drum roll please*  WIND SPRINTS!!!...I have never done them before. They are comprised of 20 seconds at 8.0 mph and 60 seconds at 3.0 mph. I managed to do 15 sprints in the 20 minutes I was on the treadmill (not counting the 3 minute warm-up and 4 minute cool down)

Man these made me tired....I HATE how much I enjoyed doing these...They will definitely be built into the normal schedule.

So the reason I am amazed that I am still alive is because of the "30 Day Ab Challenge"...

Day 3 wasn't anything too crazy....25 Sit Ups, 10 Crunches, 10 Leg Lifts, and a 15s plank....But good lord...I started off sore and then did them AFTER my wind sprints. Thank god tomorrow is a rest day!

So, my food today was AMAZING...I was pretty proud.

I made a lean 1 shake for breakfast...

Pack a lunch that was only 282 calories and 17 grams of protein. While the protein count could have been higher it was AMAZING!!!

Snack when I got home was a cheese snack

Dinner was a naked Mango Mojo burrito with sour cream and chips...it was AMAZING...

After all of this I was at a little less than 1300 calories...

So after all of this I elected to go over my calories by a bit more in order to drink a Nectar protein shake and had a sting cheese...I can't imagine how sore I would have been tomorrow if I didn't take in the 40 grams of protein....

Well, I am done rambling...tomorrow I am going to spend the day with my favorite blonde haired man...My baby boy D!

Painful June has begun

Man this 30 Day Ab Challenge is going to kick my ass.

Anyways....short summary of the day.

Had to work. It was the first day of my first ERISA audit. For those non-accountants out there it is a DOL (Department of Labor) audit on 401(k) plans that have more than 100 participants. They are fun and a nice change from assurance audits.

Came home...took my kiddos to the track....walked a mile while I talked with my Dad...didn't really get a workout done but I completed Day 2/30 for my ab challenge.

Tomorrow I don't have to be to work until 10am so I am hoping to get to bed (I say as I lay here typing feverishly with my thumbs) and get up at 5:30 to go for a morning run.

Ok...So with that I sign off...just wanted to keep up my streak.

Wow...today was a rough one!

You would think that having a kid free night with your hubby would cure all that ails you...but for some reason...it didn't.

I woke up tired and just feeling...yucky....That is my big grown up word for how I felt.

After being up for about an hour I feel asleep on the couch which was the worst mistake I could have made. It is like sleeping on a medieval torture device....H O R I B B L E !!!

I just seemed/felt/have been feeling so angry lately...I need to work on this before it manifests in other ways.

Anyways, to touch on that later, my baby girl had a softball game today.

They won...she was SUPER excited and they had a blast.

I apologize for the randomness in this post...I am just trying to get these thoughts out of my head...

So after all was said and done I went out for a run...it was horrible...

I only ran about 1.34 miles before I started walking. That means that I walked 1.66 miles. I had to finish because I was out side and I had to finish or not go home. Again, I felt icky...yucky...gross...and just wanted to give up. But I didn't, I didn't call my hubby and make him come get me.

I even finished my Day 1 of the 30 Day Ab Challenge.

So with this randomness...I am going to go to bed...and sleep and hope to get up and run again in the morning.