Monday, December 16, 2013

Ever feel like you are just making excuses?

Today was weigh in day at Curves....Man did I NOT want to get out of bed....I so badly wanted to just go back to sleep under my warm blanket for the 60 extra minutes I could get....but I didn't!

Once again stepping on the scale my weight was up...I wasn't surprised by is why:

  1. I hadn't worked out in over a week....something like 13 days to be exact
  2. It is my time of the month...the oh so fun 10 days of crazy hormones and water retention
  3. Sinus infection...I have been since (which is why I didn't work out) and am still on antibiotics.
  4. Final exam stress...this one has been a doozy despite the fact that I have done really well on all of my exams.
So I look at this list....and I UNDERSTAND why my weight is up....but I feel like I am making an excuse. I am excusing the choices I made and what I ate and what I did or didn't do. It doesn't feel like I am genuinely taking my lumps over my failure. My goal for the last four months was to get out of the 270's. I wanted to weigh 269.?? by December 27th. That would put me down 60 pounds, forty pounds shy of the 100 I WANTED to lose when I made my goal on my surgery day. I don't consider it an over all failure that I won't make 100, 60 pounds is still pretty good. What I do consider a failure is that fact that I have been within 5 pounds of my goal for MONTHS!!!!!!

I can't get past the 60 pound mark to save my life!!!!

I am frustrated....and I don't know what to do shy of living on protein shakes...I am sure I will figure it out but in this hormone induces pity party of one I am frustrated, sad, and stressed. Stressed that no matter what I do I will still be this fat next December.

I need to snap out of it....I start my new job tomorrow and the rest of my life is falling into place...This had got to stop and I need to stop making excuses. I need to decide that succeeding is MORE important then the piece of fudge. Or that I AM important enough to take the time to go to the gym even if that means going to bed early (which wouldn't be a bad idea over all).

Over the next few days I am going to be coming up with my new goal post-it...Hope I can get myself into a better frame of mind!

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