Self loathing and "Fat Girl Mentality"

Self Loathing:  

I suck...

I had all these noble intention when I started this little vacation.

I am not using this as an excuse it is merely an explanation...I forgot my BC pills at home. I don't use them for their purpose, they are to treat my PCOS. The major drawback to this is that my period started three weeks early...and it started only 8 days after my last one. you would think that this would be a easy, less painful one...it SO isn't!

Becasue of the pain and the stress of this trip, I have been eating a ton of shit I shouldn't. I have eaten chinese food, potato oles, brownies, chips, cookies, rice....I mean...I know better...

This is where the "Fat Girl Mentality" come from...

Fat Girl Mentality

I have found myself thinking...."Well I already f-ed up for the day why should I bother?" This is stupid and I need to STOP!

I need to stop making excuses...that is part of the reason why I am writing this blog. I need something to look back on and realize that I have messed up...

Step in the right direction

I found these AWESOME Bento Boxes at Walmart. I got one for me and one for my daughter. It has a shelf that you throw in the freezer, a section for your main course, and then three containers for stuff.

I am excited...I am going to pack my daughter healthy lunches.  She won't be eating any more of the shitty public school out of a box lunches that she had last year.

I also got one for me. This upcoming semester I have an hour and forty five minute break between classes and I am going to pack my lunch. I am going to make me healthy lunches that are band and paleo friendly...

In conclusion:

While I accept the fact that I may fail...I am going to stop the excuses right now. No more brownies/chips/crap for me. I am going to make healthy stuff even if I have to go to the store to buy it myself. I am not going to push my eating habits onto everyone else, but I am no longer going to adapt theirs!